Monday 25 October 2010

Sleeping in a bed



...is so much better than sleeping on a roof. What was I thinking?

It would have been alright if not for the needlessly over-amplified singing of the Muezzin waking me up in the middle of the night, as the Muslim Quarter tries to upstage its neighbours by being the loudest at worshipping their version of the One True God, who clearly doesn't exist if you just think about if for a second (how old are you, five?)

Muslims: your idea of god is no less ridiculous than all the rest. Now turn the volume down and we can all get some sleep.

Then there's the relentless fucking bells that start chiming out a few hours later from all directions, signalling seemingly random increments of time (6:12am - time to get up and praise YHWH), like you're trapped in a flat with an audiophile who's determined to show off the capabilities of his new quadrophonic sound system by blasting out Pink Floyd's 'Time' at ear-splitting volume every 11 minutes.

Christians: Rather than all those unnecessary chimes, why not simply chirp out on the hour, like a digital watch? Or, if you insist, five pips like on the radio? Sort it out.

It's important to respect local customs, isn't it? At least the Jews are quieter and more considerate in following their wrong beliefs.

Now I understand why this city's been destroyed so many times. I like it too much to hate it though. Now I'm going to get some sleep in my extraordinary indoors bed. (A bed inside - who would have thought?)